May 07, 2009 
by Rebekah Sanderlin
A group of about a dozen military spouses representing Blue Star Families and National Military Family Association traveled to the nation’s capitol to meet with Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and 11 other Congressional representatives on Tuesday, May 5.
The spouses were invited to the meeting after a survey of military families showed that 94% of the almost 3,000 respondents said they believe that Americans without close ties to the military do not understand or appreciate the sacrifices that service members and their families are making.
The survey was conducted by Blue Star Families with distribution support from CinCHouse.com, the American Red Cross, the USO, National Military Family Association, Armed Forces YMCA, Military Spouse Magazine and Military.com.
The survey asked respondents to rate issues according to which were the most and least important to them. Not surprisingly, the war and the economy tied for the most important issue - with 25 percent of respondents listing each issue as being the most important to them. Also not surprising, veterans services rated third most important, with 10 percent citing that as the most important issue and terrorism came in fourth, with nine percent saying it was the most important. The other issues, in the order they ranked on the survey, are education, government corruption, health care, housing market/foreclosure crisis, immigration, taxes, environment and transportation/general infrastructure.
On a list of issues they could be improved upon, the quality of health care available to military families ranked as the area most in need of improvement with access to healthcare ranking as the next neediest. Respondents, however, said they were pleased with their commissaries and exchanges as well as with the chaplain services.
The testimony during the congressional meeting was at times tearful and the questions were probing, but the spouses - all members of the National Military Family Association and Blue Star Families groups - were candid with the elected officials. They talked about the struggles, loneliness and lack of support they experienced during deployments, the effects frequent moves have on their families, the difficulty and discrimination they’ve experienced in trying to find employment and the lack of resources available on military installations for mental health care.
Rep. Kay Granger, a Republican from Texas, told the military spouses that she was disheartened to hear the results of the survey. "It means that we as a nation are not doing what we should be doing," she said.
Pam Stokes Eggleston, a Blue Star Families member whose husband retired from the Army after being injured in combat during both of his tours in Iraq, was the first military spouse to speak. She told the people gathered that the survey findings resonated with her.
“My husband spent three years at Walter Reed and we had to reimagine what our life would look like,” Eggleston said. “Gatherings like the one here today do help. This lets us know that our country’s leadership cares and wants to help.”
Joyce Wessel Raezar, chief operating officer of the NMFA, said that military families just want to tell their stories but they need officials to listen.
Pelosi told the military spouses that the two organizations they represented are the “guardians of a promise made by President Lincoln in the Gettysburg Address to care for him that has borne the battle and for his widow and children.
“We will be working with the [Obama] Administration to insure that your sacrifices are appreciated - not just in word but in deed,” Pelosi said.
Other officials echoed Pelosi’s statements, with several saying that they were sad to hear the survey’s results.
Rep. Susan Davis, a Republican who represents the San Diego, Calif. area, said she was “saddened ... but not surprised” by the survey findings.
“We are here to hear what are the gaps? What can we do? How can we raise the consciousness of the country?” Davis asked.
Rep. Ike Skelton, a Democrat from MO and the Chairman of the House Armed Services Committee, told the spouses that he was proud of them. “It’s important that you do what you do to support your spouse,” he said. “It’s a tough profession, sometimes thankless, sometimes dangerous.”
After the meeting Claire Woodward, the executive director of Blue Star Families, said she was thrilled to have had the ear of the Speaker of the House of Representatives and the other officials present.
“It’s nice to be given a forum to talk about the issues that are important to military families,” Woodward said. “I think their interest is sincere. It’s encouraging that there is not just an interest in hearing our stories, but there is an interest in trying to write legislation.”
Others present for the meeting included Tina Tchen of the White House Council on Women and Girls, Rep. Carole Shea-Porter (D-NH), Rep. Tim Walz (D-MN, Rep. Gwen Moore (D-WI), Rep. Harry Teague (D-NM), Rep. Niki Tsongas (D-MA), Rep. Kathy Dahlkemper, (D-PA), Rep. John Hall (D-NY) and Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ), who is herself the wife of a Navy pilot.