December 07, 2008 
Moving a household is always difficult, but especially when small children are involved. These highly-mobile creatures are not always rational when it comes to staying out of the way of movers or putting debris into their mouths. Moreover, relocation oftens throws children into an emotional whirl. Their little world is changing completely, and they may be frightened. Add to that the travel, disturbed schedule and lack of sleep and you have some cranky children at the worst time possible.
Yet thousands of military families relocate with small children every year, and your relocation can go more smoothly with some advance planning.
Get Help
If at all possible, get grandma or a babysitter to take care of your children during move-out day so you can monitor the movers. If not, get Dad to take responsibility for them. Either way, try to get them out of the house and off on a fun adventure that will distract them from the stampede going in and out their front door.
A Sense of Adventure
Treating a relocation as an adventure helps children focus on the postive. Most families prefer to hit the road immediately following their move-out. This prevents the children from dwelling on an empty house and makes it feel like a family vacation. If that's not possible, you have several options. First is to stay at a hotel or friends house where their are interesting things, like a pool, to distract the children. If you must stay in your empty house, pretend you are camping out. Let your children make tents out of blankets and have the family sleep together.
Schedule Travel Reasonably
Small children can only sit so long in a car, so expect to spend two hours on pit stop during one day's travel. Choose pit stops with playground areas so children can expen some energy and see other children. Schedule those pit stops around meals, diaper changes and nap time so your children are neither hungry, wet or awakened from a much-needed nap. Remember also that you will have only so energy, so don't drive until you are nearly asleep. Give yourself a few hours to relax before going to bed. A hot bath will help your children calm down before putting them to sleep in an unknown bed.
If traveling by air overseas, you may wish to consult a doctor in advance about "Baby Benedryl." It may sound cruel, but experienced military moms and doctors know that an over-tired child can seriously stress an entire family.
Move In Aggressively
Move-ins can be dangerous for children because unpacked items are hard to protect. Children get into things or race around tottering stacks of boxes. You have two goals: Get everything up and out of the way, and 2) Make it feel like home as quickly as possible.
As with move-out day, have one person take the children and the other handle the move-in. If at all possible, have the parent with children stay and extra day at a hotel or grandma's house. Whoever is handling the move in should be very aggressive with the movers and insist that every box in the house is unpacked. It may sound like an impossible task, but that is what they are paid to do -- and their team will do it more quickly than just you.
Ask the movers to upack your children's rooms first. Their first goal is the re-construct the children's beds, and you can hang any wall items so that the bedrooms feel like home to your children. For kitchen items and books, follow behind your movers and put everything they place onto the counter onto shelves. It doesn't matter if the shelves are organized, so long as the items are up and out of the way. This will allow your packers to finish unpacking. You can re-organize everything in the following months, but at least these items will be out of reach of your children. For those with very small children, you may want to vacuum any room that has been completed by the movers to pick up the inevitably loose nails, wooden splinters and other items that kids love to put in their mouths.
The parent who is responsible for the children should conduct at least two errands during the day. The first is to obtain household items such as a shower curtain -- a critical luxury at the end of any move. The second goal is grocery shopping. You'll feel better and save money with a home-cooked meal, even if it is chilli out of a can.
There is no doubt that relocating with small children is just plain exhausting. With any luck, however, you can finish a tough days move with a meal at your new home, baths for you and the kids, and a cozy bed to sleep in.